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About Me
- Nick Wheeler
- I'm gay. I used to be Mormon. I write about that here. I also write (or vlog!) about whatever else happens to be on my mind. Sometimes I post creative projects. If you want them or something similar for yourself or someone you love, email me, because I love money.
Hip Hip Hooray! (for Iowa)
ReplyDeleteMy "Eastern connections" (my sister-in-law married the love of her life, who is also female, last June, & they live out East) were terribly depressed over the end of same sex marriage in CA. I didn't follow the politics of it all, but, the version I heard from them, was, that it was a "Mormon contingent" (including from neighboring states) that hammered the nail in the coffin.
I understand that people must fight for what they believe in; I'm not sure that particular fight expresses, to me, the heart of all Christian religions, which, as I understand it, is that "God is Love." It makes me, also, rather ashamed of where I live. That it's so vehemently unwelcoming to those I love, and, a BAD PLACE TO RAISE THEIR (future) CHILDREN. Ironic, with the Mormon love of children, I think. The worst part might be, that, when I focus on how I feel about all this, it's obvious to me... I'm so ANGRY that they can't move here, & allow me to actively aunt their kids some day that I, too, get in a state where I'm not expressing my own sacred, loving aspects. More, I seem to channel the Vengeful aspects, like, the (outdated) Old Testament God. (I was raised Christian, but, I've always had a Unitarian philosophy, I would say.) Anyway, I just feel, if I fault Mormons for not reflecting sacred love, I should try not to MIMIC that.
I think you should know, that the earlier paper on Same Sex marriage you posted made me realize something. You made the point that "any increase in monogamy is a point for the strength of marriage in society." I realized, yes, good monogamous marriages, with, also, emotional fidelity and committment to the other's well-being, are, indeed, huge promoters and strengtheners of the institution of marriage. I'd seen a great same-sex marriage, but hadn't really made the connection to the "institution of marriage." My sis-in-law, S, and her partner, Z, really ARE poster-women for marriage!! Truly. They are so good for each other; EVERYONE that knew them before they were together says this, says they're way better together than apart. Also, the decision to marry did change the relationship, I think. "Only marriage is marriage," as you quoted. I unconditionally support gay rights/marriage, but, your paper made me think about the inner aspects of it more closely. They really are a great example of why couples should marry.
Also, I was SO jealous, attending their wedding. Two beautiful wedding dresses worn under the wedding arch! There was only one pretty, girly outfit at mine. Although Paul did wear a gorgeous blue vest with flowers embroidered on it.
(Oops... well, I should add, as far as I can tell, he isn't gay. We've been together 14 years, I think I'm safe... ;P I mean this to be funny. I think it might be uncomfortable to be married to someone who's gay, since I'm not. Although, I suppose, stranger & more uncomfortable things have happened... like overturning same sex marriage in CA.)